Hello. ShatteredX speaking. Some dudes nominated me and regrettably, I accepted. I ask for your vote to the CoE with the resolve of a man being asked to help carry someone else’s couch up four flights of stairs.
The last council I was elected to was my middle school’s Student Council at the age of 13. At year’s end, when asked who would not be seeking reelection, I alone raised my hand and explained: I had contributed nothing, spoken never, and my chair would be better occupied by literally anyone, including the chair itself.
My IRL job keeps shoveling more nonsense on my desk, meaning I will approach any CoE duties with the engagement level of a houseplant. I do not promise effort, attendance, or in some edge cases, consciousness.
If elected, I will serve poorly, reluctantly, and envision making a statement in a year’s time referencing a chair sitting on itself, etc.
ShatteredX out.